‘A Time to Lose and a Time to Gain’ (Ecc 3:6) πŸ˜₯πŸ’” 3 Lessons Learned from taking L’s in 2018

If 2018 were to be summed up by using just an album title, it’d likely be called ‘Wins and Losses’ by Meek Mill, only at times it felt as if I took more L’s than anything else. Loss in friendships, loss in advancement opportunities on the job, even loss of life (death of loved one). With so much loss everywhere, it can be difficult to remain optimistic, however I’m realizing that not every ‘L’ is equivalent to loss. Here’s what taking multiple L’s has taught me:

1. Anything that doesn’t bear fruit must be cut off. This includes friendships, too.

I’ve had to let go of many friendships last year, some willingly, others not so much (on my part). What made it even harder was the history. I’ve known each one a great deal of years and celebrated many milestones with everyone of them. However, when I began to minimize some of my efforts, I realized that what remained was a one-sided friendship. That’s not what God desires for our us. It’s the Lord’s will for us to be equally yoked (2 Cor. 6: 14- 17) and for every area of our lives to bear fruit (evidence of God’s goodness, John 15), including friendships. Anything that doesn’t bear fruit will be cut off. Period.

2. God has the ability to open and close doors.

When I was overlooked for an advanced opportunity at work, I was beyond disappointed. On a scale of pretezel to ocean, let’s just say I was Dead Sea salty at how things turned out. I took it really hard and honestly still am. But the Bible tells us that God opens and closes doors (Isa. 22:22). If the door didn’t open, then it means it wasn’t for me. According to God’s word in Jeremiah 29:11, He has plans to give us a hope and a future. I may not have gotten this opportunity, but there’s no doubt that God has something (better) in store for my future.

3. Loss is apart of life

Though it’s the last thing we want to hear, we will experience loss in our lifetime. According to Ecclesiastes, there’s a time and season for everything, including a time to lose and a time to gain. We may not have the answers to all of life’s tough questions but we can trust that God makes no mistakes, even in painful seasons of loss.

Did 2018 bring you loss of any form? How did you handle it?

– A Black Girl About Town


  1. Love this article. Life is literally a rollercoaster 😣. I also lost a loved one last year very tragically and suddenly, and went through some other things. It’s comforting to know that we won’t struggle like this forever. Revelation 21:4 always helps me so much. β€œAnd he will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore. The former things have passed away.” πŸ’–πŸ’–

  2. Praying for your strength. I’m still on an emotional and spiritual continuum. It gets better, with faith, family, and friends. Thanks for your transparency. I recently wrote a blog post describing the most difficult thing about being a black female medical student. I hope you’ll have a chance to read.

    1. Aww. Thank you so much for reading. 😊I work at a hospital so I always try to be extra nice to the black med students. Lord only know the struggle y’all go through. I look forward to reading πŸ’–

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: